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here we go again -
Aug. 11th, 2010 01:41 amOut of morbid curiosity (the only explanation I can devise anyway), I'm watching GI Joe - yeah, the movie one. So, erm -
Dear Mr. Sommers - (and how did I miss that he directed this?)
There is this one small thing that you, as the writer/director person for these movies you make, need to remember. It's called A PLOT. And no, I don't mean a tract of land. I mean the interconnected story bits that hold the scenes of the movie together, thus forming a cohesive whole. Funny thing, it also makes the movie interesting.
Okay, in Van Helsing I can forgive a little bit with the plot holes b/c I found the movie interesting enough to watch on it's own. But for GI Joe? Man you can't just take people's childhood and slap some shit together with some CGI and witty one-liners and call it a 'movie'.
Some of the CGI wasn't even that good. Also - why are the 'Joes' suddenly dressed like Robocop? And acting like The Greatest American Hero? (RTFM already - at least TGAH had an excuse - he LOST his.) Seriously? Iron Man is laughing at you right now.
Don't even get me started on the first few minutes that told me you've seen at least 3 seasons of Stargate SG-1 and one of Dr. Who. The idea is steal the Replicators from SG-1, then give them to Dr. Who? Fail.
Also - stop setting things in Paris for you movies and using recycled Alan Silvestri music. It's formulaic. I like Silvestri's stuff - but not when Van Helsing's music is used over GI Joe.
Just how much CGI glass is broken in this movie anyway?
This is *not* the GI Joe from the pretty cool '80's cartoon. I understand modernizing, but holy crap, try to get it RIGHT, okay?
Oh, and have a PLOT for crying out loud!
No love -
H2
(( I still have 5 mins left of this movie, and I'm afraid to find out how else they've fucked this up. ))
ETA: okay - more than 5 mins, but whatever. And also - I forgot to mention Mr. Eccelston's really awful Scottish accent. *shakes head*
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replies over there.
Dear Mr. Sommers - (and how did I miss that he directed this?)
There is this one small thing that you, as the writer/director person for these movies you make, need to remember. It's called A PLOT. And no, I don't mean a tract of land. I mean the interconnected story bits that hold the scenes of the movie together, thus forming a cohesive whole. Funny thing, it also makes the movie interesting.
Okay, in Van Helsing I can forgive a little bit with the plot holes b/c I found the movie interesting enough to watch on it's own. But for GI Joe? Man you can't just take people's childhood and slap some shit together with some CGI and witty one-liners and call it a 'movie'.
Some of the CGI wasn't even that good. Also - why are the 'Joes' suddenly dressed like Robocop? And acting like The Greatest American Hero? (RTFM already - at least TGAH had an excuse - he LOST his.) Seriously? Iron Man is laughing at you right now.
Don't even get me started on the first few minutes that told me you've seen at least 3 seasons of Stargate SG-1 and one of Dr. Who. The idea is steal the Replicators from SG-1, then give them to Dr. Who? Fail.
Also - stop setting things in Paris for you movies and using recycled Alan Silvestri music. It's formulaic. I like Silvestri's stuff - but not when Van Helsing's music is used over GI Joe.
Just how much CGI glass is broken in this movie anyway?
This is *not* the GI Joe from the pretty cool '80's cartoon. I understand modernizing, but holy crap, try to get it RIGHT, okay?
Oh, and have a PLOT for crying out loud!
No love -
H2
(( I still have 5 mins left of this movie, and I'm afraid to find out how else they've fucked this up. ))
ETA: okay - more than 5 mins, but whatever. And also - I forgot to mention Mr. Eccelston's really awful Scottish accent. *shakes head*
I'm collecting my replies on Dreamwidth. Come play with me using your own Dreamwidth account or OpenID!
